We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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