You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
her vagine was all disorganized.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
