He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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