Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
