What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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