I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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