He is an equal opportunity slut.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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