areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
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Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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