my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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