she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
