So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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