I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.