Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
