Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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