I accidentally burped into my bong.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize