like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
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dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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