On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
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I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
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I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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