I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Me. At least after what I've been through.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
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My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
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I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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