You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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