I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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