No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
