so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
