He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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