I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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