It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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