Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize