he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
