i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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