just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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