and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
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we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
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Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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