Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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