The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
