he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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