I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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