My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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