Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
