I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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