what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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