there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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