Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
