My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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