laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
