I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
