i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
