i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
