At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I think my moral compass just broke
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