It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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