I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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