so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
