I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
