he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
