I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
A+ Viking dick
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