Texts From Last Night

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  (713): View more from Texas

  Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?

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  (713): Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing? http://tfl.nu/g5e5
  Replies (1) Good night (1171) Bad night (624)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you

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  (218): You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you http://tfl.nu/pqp2
  Replies (29) Good night (1423) Bad night (2207)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?

  (1-251): View more from Alabama

  Why are you in my underwear drawer?

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  (251): Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer? (1-251): Why are you in my underwear drawer? http://tfl.nu/y2d4
  Replies (15) Good night (4694) Bad night (1076)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..

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  (708): He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam.. http://tfl.nu/opqs
  Replies (30) Good night (3411) Bad night (2244)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.

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  (816): I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste. http://tfl.nu/fckj
  Replies (32) Good night (5633) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.

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  (940): Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him. http://tfl.nu/o9z5
  Replies (10) Good night (990) Bad night (3516)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house

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  (573): i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house http://tfl.nu/7ii5
  Replies (3) Good night (1692) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection

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  (516): perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection http://tfl.nu/w4cf
  Replies (8) Good night (619) Bad night (1785)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.

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  (360): Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred. http://tfl.nu/7z2u
  Replies (9) Good night (443) Bad night (1444)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.

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  (239): Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest. http://tfl.nu/uwa9
  Replies (10) Good night (1539) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.

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  (913): Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway. http://tfl.nu/1wlj
  Replies (0) Good night (331) Bad night (648)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!

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  (925): You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here! http://tfl.nu/pvgq
  Replies (4) Good night (810) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.

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  (405): I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow. http://tfl.nu/lb44
  Replies (2) Good night (578) Bad night (432)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.

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  (415): My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years. http://tfl.nu/u3yw
  Replies (3) Good night (769) Bad night (359)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.

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  (330): I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup. http://tfl.nu/heko
  Replies (2) Good night (776) Bad night (269)

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