And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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